Where I Am At

    I am not good at this, I just want to warn you all now!
    I have a desire to journal, a desire to express myself with words but I am normally disappointed with myself when I put pen to paper, or in this case, text on the ever-intimidating internet! However, I am not one to give up on myself that easily and I am going to give this another try. Yes, I did have a blog before but kept it private for fear that someone would find it online and expect daily posts...I think I posted 4 things in 12 months. Woops! This one will be different, this one will be a (hopefully) weekly opportunity for me to decompress, reflect upon, and experience my week through written word that can be shared with friends and family. I shall begin by giving you a brief look at where I am at in my life right now and hopefully launch myself into a writing frenzy that showcases the equally boring and exciting life that I lead (well, sometimes it seems to lead me).

     This May I graduated from Saint Louis University (SLU) and although it is June and I graduated three and a half weeks ago I have not yet had time to fully process my emotions, delight in the joys of friendship, and cry about the sadness and anxiety of this huge life transition that I am embarking upon. The weekend of graduation came and went too quickly, I cried through most of the wonderful moments because of the complete joy I felt having my friends and family together in the first place I have truly loved and called home (other than my childhood home of course). I laughed with my best friends, said "See you later" not goodbye to far to many beautiful people, and I packed....oh goodness, I packed. It took two cars and a full minivan to transport all of my "stuff" six hours from St. Louis to Ohio. At the end of the packing and hugs it was time to leave, but, as I told myself, not for forever. I will be back St. Louis, you can count on it!
        

     I got home, barely unpacked as many boxes as I could and then packed another bag full of clothing suited for all seasons as I was taking a trip to Marquette, MI with my high school best friends for a week! Let me tell you, the excitement was through the roof as we began our 10 hour drive at 12am one Wednesday knowing that we had not been able to spend quality time together like this since high school, aka 4 years ago! One say it rained, one day it snowed (very lightly for like 5 minutes but it still counted!), one day it was warm enough we laid in our bathing suits on the beach! The week went by quickly, again leaving me no time to be completely happy or completely sad or completely present since my heart was being torn between the loss of leaving St. Louis and my SLU experience and best friends from college behind and the excitement of being with my closest friends from high school who know me almost better than I know myself. To sum it all up, for the past couple of weeks I have been an emotional mess; if a sad song comes on the radio or a happy clip is on TV I am instantly balling and if someone else is laughing I am bound to join in even if I don't know why. (No people, this 22 year old, boy-friend free, independent lady is not pregnant even though my emotions are crazy!) :) 

  

     To fast forward, I arrived home from vacation and helped my mom get our house ready to accept family members from Kansas City and Cincinnati and also throw a wonderful graduation party for my beautiful little sister who, two weeks after my college graduation, graduated from high school. We are a proud household right now to say the least! And even before the festivities concluded I began my summer nannying position, and I am currently sitting at a kitchen island that is not mine, sipping on coffee writing this as the little boy plays with friends next door. If you think that was a quick explanation of the past (almost) 4 weeks you better believe it!

     I am happy, I am proud, I am slightly tired, I am attempting to live each day to the fullest, and I am thankful you are here reading my thoughts and I promise to you, and myself, that this is the first of many posts!